My (31F) boyfriend (45M) of two years has had ups and downs, the lows were about a year into our relationship. He told me that he wasn’t sur...
My (31F) boyfriend (45M) of two years has had ups and downs, the lows were about a year into our relationship. He told me that he wasn’t sure if he wanted to get married or have children, that he was “confused.” his feelings for me.
I have space for him and he very quickly he said he’s over that and he wants those things, and he wants them with me. I am also the first relationship of his that lasts more than 10 months. He has a hard time talking about his feelings and I’ve been telling him that I want to move out and/or get engaged soon.
He says that he has commitment fears, but he’s getting over them. FF until last night I was looking for paper at his house to write a wifi code and I took a black notebook and the page that opened had my name all over it. I didn’t even know I kept a journal and I didn’t read it all, but the bits I did briefly were devastating.
They were written 2 months ago and basically said that he didn’t know what to do about my situation, that he was scared by how much I liked him (???), that he feels shallow for putting such a high value on appearance (I’m not unattractive or overweight, which are things she says she doesn’t like), she says she misses me when we’re apart but doesn’t always want to be there when we’re together.
He feels that he should commit to me because of the pressure from the people around him, me and the desire to have children. She also wondered if breakups are harder when you’ve been with a person for a while.
The previous page (which was undated) had her goals for what I’m guessing will be this year based on a few of them – she listed “dating” and “talking to 5 girls a week” as two of her goals. This could be from a month, a year or 2 years ago.
I feel pretty devastated, I thought he was over this and I don’t know how to approach it. I love this man and I thought we had a future. Could it be last-minute nerves given his commitment fears? He told me a couple of weeks ago that he was going to start therapy for his commitment issues. Any advice would be appreciated. TLDR;
I saw a page from my boyfriend’s journal and he basically said he’s not sure about me, hinted at the possibility of breaking up/dating other people, thinks I’m unattractive, and is afraid of my “intensity” (which I never thought I was) . Looking for some advice beyond “just breaking up” as I really love this man.
My (31F) boyfriend (45M) of two years has had ups and downs, the lows were about a year into our relationship. He told me that he wasn’t sure if he wanted to get married or have children, that he was “confused.” his feelings for me.
I have space for him and he very quickly he said he’s over that and he wants those things, and he wants them with me. I am also the first relationship of his that lasts more than 10 months. He has a hard time talking about his feelings and I’ve been telling him that I want to move out and/or get engaged soon.
He says that he has commitment fears, but he’s getting over them. FF until last night I was looking for paper at his house to write a wifi code and I took a black notebook and the page that opened had my name all over it. I didn’t even know I kept a journal and I didn’t read it all, but the bits I did briefly were devastating.
They were written 2 months ago and basically said that he didn’t know what to do about my situation, that he was scared by how much I liked him (???), that he feels shallow for putting such a high value on appearance (I’m not unattractive or overweight, which are things she says she doesn’t like), she says she misses me when we’re apart but doesn’t always want to be there when we’re together. He feels that he should commit to me because of the pressure from the people around him, me and the desire to have children.
She also wondered if breakups are harder when you’ve been with a person for a while. The previous page (which was undated) had her goals for what I’m guessing will be this year based on a few of them – she listed “dating” and “talking to 5 girls a week” as two of her goals. This could be from a month, a year or 2 years ago.
I feel pretty devastated, I thought he was over this and I don’t know how to approach it. I love this man and I thought we had a future. Could it be last-minute nerves given his commitment fears? He told me a couple of weeks ago that he was going to start therapy for his commitment issues.
Any advice would be appreciated. TLDR; I saw a page from my boyfriend’s journal and he basically said he’s not sure about me, hinted at the possibility of breaking up/dating other people, thinks I’m unattractive, and is afraid of my “intensity” (which I never thought I was) . Looking for some advice beyond “just breaking up” as I really love this man.
It's a sound scan and many of the pieces of info in the playscript are extremely insightful – especially ones who are sensing for it. It's easily statute, encompassing and not mendacious. Outlaw Bauer is of pedagogy asymptomatic enlightened some this bailiwick and you can inform a abstraction or two change if your relation is sailing smoothen: Click Here
