Phew. That is a loaded topic. Especially, if you’re a busy professional woman trying to get it all done. After all, every woman knows ...
Phew.
That is a loaded topic.
Especially, if you’re a busy professional woman trying to get it all done.
After all, every woman knows that if she does everything right and is perfect in every way, she will be lovable and get the love she wants.
Swill!
Being perfect will not make them love you.
In fact, trying to be perfect makes you irritable. It makes it challenging for other people to be around you. And that makes you one of the hardest people to love.
So stop striving for perfection!
Instead, accept your imperfections.
What makes women strive for perfection?
To embrace and love your glorious imperfections, you must first understand what drives your striving for perfection.
In a word: fear.
As women in general, and busy professional women in particular, the number one fear that drives our striving for perfection is the fear of not being good enough.
Others’ judgment of not being good enough:
· Breast.
· Company owner.
· Career woman.
· Wife.
· Sister.
· Daughter.
Judgment of self as not being good enough:
· Person!
Oh!
For many women, the fear of not being good enough came from people we loved or admired who wanted us to be, do, or have more. Although apparently innocent and dressed in the ‘sheepskin’ of good intentions, the wolf that was hot on our heels eroded our self-confidence and germinated our mistrust in ourselves and in others.
For other women, having self-confidence was not modeled or valued. As a result, being ‘perfect’ meant being like someone else who was heard praised for their perfection.
Either way, “The condition, state, or quality of being free or as free as possible from all defects or faults,” as the Merriam-Webster dictionary defines it, is an impossible ideal.
Why being a perfectionist is bad for you
You miss RREP&A.
That is rest, recovery, tranquility, peace and acceptance.
As busy professional women, we need PR&A.
Without it, we are:
R. it means restless,
R. means relapse into ill health, feeling
me means ashamed, converted
P means panic and have
A means anxiety.
When that happens, we experience adrenal fatigue, hormonal imbalances, and become moody around others.
Three steps to embracing your beautiful imperfections
Step 1: Love yourself.
The first step is the most difficult. It is the step that unlocks any resistance you have to the next steps.
First love yourself. You just have to. There is no beating around the bush about it. So, I’ll go straight to the heart of this: without self-love, there is no love. I know. That’s big to swallow.
Here’s how you do it: Cozy up on the sofa one afternoon with a cup of tea, a pad of paper, and your favorite pen. Start making a list of all the things you have accomplished in your life. List everything big and small.
Wow! Right? Look how much you have achieved! It’s pretty amazing!
Now, reread the list and acknowledge all that you have accomplished. Let it sink in The first step to embracing your beautiful imperfections is to first love yourself.
Step 2: Take care of your love.
What the hell does that mean?
It means respecting and honoring your body and your emotions. And take time to treasure and honor the body and emotions of the special people in your life. Your partner, your children and your dear friends should be cherished.
Here’s how to do it: Nourish your body with good food, trust your intuition, speak your truth and honor the truth of others, respect the body of others and lean on yourself with love to meet needs in healthy ways.
Step 3: Love your imperfections.
The heart of this article is realizing that your imperfections are actually your own unique and personal perfections. They are what make you who you are. They are as individual as snowflakes and as precious as diamonds. Embrace your diamonds and snowflakes.
Your imperfections are your lessons. Think of them as guides along your path of achievement.
Here’s how you do it: Remember the list you made in Step 1? Check that list. Choose five that you are proud of achieving. Write them down on five separate pieces of paper. Then list the ‘mistakes’ he made along the way that led to his achievement.
Watch? Each ‘mistake’ was simply a stepping stone to his incredible achievements.
Love your imperfections. Hug them. Honor them for how they have helped you become the confident professional woman you know yourself to be. Loving your perfections is liberating. She gives you permission to take the pressure off yourself and relax a bit. Follow these three steps and accept your imperfections now. She will free you to fly into a loving inner space.
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